Well, do ya’?
If you’ve never asked yourself this question, you might be missing out on a whole lotta information.
Wondering why you’re not creating the results you want (such as in your bank account, finishing your patient notes on time, getting that workout in, or even just being fully present in the moment)?
Could it be that you’re not doing what you say you’re going to do?
For some, the problem may be the step before this: not even telling yourself what to do. This comes from the habit of breaking the trust factor with yourself.
The more often you don’t do what you say you’re going to, the less likely you are to create the results you really want to create and to live the life you want to fully experience. And the less likely you are to even think of trying.
The trust factor may be broken right now, but it isn’t beyond repair or hope. Here’s a simple step to build that trust with yourself again:
1) Identify one thing that is a no-brainer on your daily schedule. Brush your teeth? Eat a meal? Kiss the kids goodnight? You may have a long list here, but you only need to pick ONE.
2) Put this action on your calendar (one that you actually look at!) or tell someone (a spouse, your child, etc.) of your plan. Tell yourself (your calendar, or your chosen accountability confidante) exactly what you are going to do and when you’re going to do it.
3). Now do it! This shouldn’t really be difficult bc it was already something you were going to do anyways.
The underlying strategy here is that your brain will be waiting/preparing/planning to complete the “no-brainer” task and at the same time will be watching to see if you actually do it.
And once it’s done (since you have already set yourself up for success by choosing this thing you’d be doing anyways), your brain will chalk it up as evidence that you can remain focused, stay on task, plan ahead, and follow-through.
It’s that simple.
Now, it’s been said that for something to become a habit, you just need to repeat it and over again. Often 30 times (though I argue that a habit can begin in the 10-14 day mark). But repeat your action, regularly and consistently. Don’t skip a single step.
And after 10 days or so of making an honest human of yourself, add on a little bit more: a new item that your brain sees as relatively easy to do. You can piggyback it to the thing that you considered a no-brainer above, or you can select a new time that will be a no-brainer to complete.
Then rinse and repeat. Look, you don’t have to go for perfection, and you don’t have to make each new add-on something major. Start small, easy, but doable. And little by little, you rebuild that trust in yourself.
If you really trusted yourself to do what you said you’re going to do, then what would stop you from telling yourself that you can achieve any goal you set your mind to?